The Girlfriend Experience?

GFE aka the girlfriend experience its much sought after. For the time contracted you try to connect with your client, be intimate, present and involved in your time together. That the job, that's what i do and i do it well. Sure i can deep throat a cock, fuck you silly and scream like a banshee but that's the easy part, finding the connection with someone in such a short space of time is a skill and one you need, to do what i do.

What i have found is that many potential clients not only expect that kind of experience within the context of the time he has purchased with you, but they now want it outside of it as well. What they want is essentially a defacto relationship of sorts. Not just a few back and forth get to know you emails which I'm always up for, i tend to be sweet but not to personal in those communication because that's how i am. I'm sweet but I'm not to personal with people i don't know well. If you want to get personal then book the time and i will be very personal then..and naked!

I had a client cancel on me recently it turned ugly and fast. Expenses were incurred on my part and the client graciously offered to reimburse me for those, then suddenly balked. It was uncomfortable and he was insulting. He sent me long winded multi paged chastising emails where he worked himself up into a massive froth of total wakadoo-ness. The last paragraph of the last email he sent me he actually had the stones to chide me on how i wasn't sympathetic to his personal financial situation. A situation that was responsible for his need to cancel our confirmed plans or rather it was his relatives personal financial situation, that's what i didn't care enough about. Yep that's right, i didn't care enough or at all about his siblings finances.

Now had this person been a friend of mine, someone i had a personal relationship with or even regular client who i had spent intimate time with i would have had sympathy for him and or his family. But i didn't because he wasn't a friend of mine he was a potential client, someone i had exchanged a few plesentries with off and on for a while until he finally decided to book time with me. He wasn't a friend, we had never broken bread, gone out for a drink or a movie, until a few days before he canceled leaving me with a hotel bill i prepaid i didn't even know his real name, i only know him by a message board handle and he was littlerly enraged that i didn't care about his siblings financial plight. yep that's a whole lotta crazy right there.

I know times are tough for a lot of people, I'm not immune to that, people i care about have been out of work for months, family members have lost retirements, every one i know is tightening their belt these days myself included. I watch the news, i know about the rising unemployment rates, I'm well aware of my Local economy taking a nose dive and how the housing bubble in my area busted over a year ago. I'm not unsympathetic to the general plight.. but... I'm NOT your fucking girlfriend. I offer a service, the girlfriend EXPERIENCE and of you want me to act like your girlfriend you need to PAY me to do it, i don't give that up for free unless i really am your girlfriend and for a potential client and long time hobbyist to throw a temper tantrum because I'm not giving him "free service" well ... whacka-doo is the word i have to repeat.

Within the context of my paid time with you if you want to lament to me about your siblings hardships i will be the most sympathetic person i know how to be, i will empathize with their difficult times if that's how you want to spend your time but until that time, i don't owe you shit.

I'm not your bitch...bitch

6 ways to save money, cut down on expenses and survive the bad economy.

The economy sucks and its affecting everyone from the local bartender to the local banker. Escorts are not immune, no matter what ratings seeking TV show you saw says. So here are some tips and tricks you can use to help survive a bad economy.

1. Be patient with unknowledgable callers and emails
We all hate the "I've never done this before" phone call or the email inquiry that's obviously sent by someone with no idea of what they are doing. They don't know the rules of the game, they ask inappropriate questions, they fumble and they frustrate the hell out of us. Be more patient with them, guide them, see if you can hand hold them into making the appointment, giving you the info you need without compromising your safety.

2. Do your own hair and nails.
Escorts are often expected to be expertly made up all the time. The nail salon and the hair salon can take a big chunk of change out of your monthly budget. Try doing your own hair and nails. If that's impossible and for some of us it is, then try doing your own every other time or stretching it out to once every 6 weeks instead of once a month. The extra change in your wallet with be worth the effort and living with the not so perfect nails every once and a while.

3. Stop eating out or ordering take out.
I'm a huge take out order person, i love having my dinner delivered to my door. I would get food delivered 4 to 5 nights a week if i could and i did. 3 months ago i stopped... cold turkey. I started cooking again. i have saved huge amounts of money this way. i stock the house with cook-able foods, i actually cook them. Also make a list before you go to the market and stick to it it will also save you money and the bonus is you get healthier too because you're not eating junk.

4. If you tour, buy your airline tickets in advance and on the "cheap days"
The cheapest travel days are Tuesday, Wednesday and Saturday. Try to avoid the beginning and end of the week as that's when all the business travelers are traveling so its popular there for more pricey. Also try to plan ahead and schedule your trip at least 14 days out for less expensive flight tickets.

5. Pay off those credit cards! Use any extra cash to reduce your current debt.
It will only make it easier on you during the harder times to come to get that credit card monkey off your back. Try to avoid late fees and possible interest rate increases by sending in your payments 10 days or a week before they are due. Or do what i do, pay them online directly from your checking account. Hey it saves me 40 to 80 bucks a month in late charges and my FICA score is raising a couple points every 2 to 3 months too, for being so diligent!

6. Happy hour!
If you really need that once and a while outing with the girls for cocktails (hell i know i do!) try happy hour. Not only are the drinks much cheaper but they often have bar snacks and when you go out earlier, you get home earlier!

If you have anything to add to the list please do we all need to hunker down in these bad times and from what i'm hearing on the news every night, its only going to get worse before it gets better.. yikes!

Gettin' it all done in time

A girlfriend and i were talking about appointment lengths, she was considering extending her 1 hour to a 90 min minimum she was having issues with getting in everything within the allotted hour. It reminded me about another working girl friend of mine who says she knows exactly how much time has lapsed in an appointment to within a couple minutes. She's not looking at a clock or a watch or anything, she's just really good at perceiving time.

Time is always an issue, no one wants a "clock-watcher" but this is a timed event so there is a balance to achieve and a skill to getting everything in within the hour. I think I learned how to manage my time well when i was working in advertising. You had so much to do and so little time to get it done but you also didn't want to look like you were panicked and flustered. That would only come back to bite you in the ass a million different ways in that nasty world.

With a client you need to be able to converse, charm, flirt, make out, get oral, get down, relax, chat and give it a second go, all within one short hour. That's a lot to do in 60 mins but its not brain surgery, its sex and human interaction. Some clients make it easy for ya, they are charming, flirtatious and ready to go go go. Others are nervous and awkward and you need to gently coax it out of them. The real job here is to get clued into what the clients expectations are early on so that you have enough time left to meet them, or in my case attempt to exceed them. yeah yeah, I can't help it I'm an overachiever. If you are observant and looking you will find those cues and clues hunt them down like youre Nancy Drew and once you figure them out you're good to go. then getting all the highlights in in time is easy.

Once in a while i might go over time because i lose track of it. Yes, i can can fall victim to a charming man once in a while or i get so entranced by an interesting conversation or person that i realize the times almost up and i haven't even gotten naked yet. A certain fascinating malpractice attorney comes to mind, i will of course stay over to make sure i leave my companion a happy, happy man. For the most part an hour is plenty of time to get it all the required high notes in, the more you do this the keener your sense of time gets. I went over a lot more then i was just starting out and still in the middle of the very big learning curve then i do now. With any job the more you do it the more efficient you are at it. I personally prefer a 2 hour or longer tryst with my gentlemen callers because then the pressure if off entirely to cram everything in a hour time frame, its easier to just go with the flow...

...cuz if you cant seduce a ready and willing man in 2 hours, well you got bigger issues then managing your time!

No Pain, No Gain

Paying for advertising is a pain in the ass. Wouldn't we all like our business to boom with little or no investment in them. Yeah that would be awesome however that's also living in a fucking dream bubble. If you think you can grow a business (any business) and not invest in it yeah I'm talking monetarily, then you are just being naive at best.

A professional escort needs professional photos, a laptop, nice lingerie, a website, and some PAID advertising on a well known tried and true legitimate escort mall website. Sure you can scrimp and cut corners (hell i do however i can) but you really need to think about how you want people to perceive you. Do you want to b a courtesan, or a cyber street ho. I know which end of the scale i hope to be seen as.

Escort advertising is god damned expensive, the reputable websites nickel and dime you to death. Extra fees from everything to additional pictures to text changes. It sucks and its costly however, i make 400 bucks an hour and im bitching and moaning because i have to pony on up to the table with 3...4...5 hundred bucks? with a simple 300 clam investment i plan on reaping at least a few grand... so really what is there to complain about. You really do have to invest money to make money and the escort biz is no different, its just a little more naked.

kinda puts in in perspective huh?

In the future everyone will be world-famous for fifteen minutes

I used to be very involved in a small local provider and hobbyist message board in L.A. I recently decided to take a break. Not only because I have knowledge that it’s being watched closely by law enforcement but because its slant has became increasing anti female. I mean who needs to participate on a message board where at every turn you have to defend who you are and what you chose to do to a bunch of small minded woman hating troglodytes. It used to be a nice community of like-minded folks but without moderation and a lack of control and interest by the site owners it has degenerated into a microcosm of misogynistic slime and ooze. Who needs that? I know I don’t. I walked away.

It wasn’t worth the effort any longer, so once day I just stopped posting. I stopped pointing out the obvious, adding my humor, perspective and thoughts to a hooker message board i had been involved with for years.

It took about a week before people noticed I wasn’t contributing. Threads where started about my absence about two weeks into my departure. Little You Tube videos (amateurishly made) were created to discuss “where was Jenny” I was more the talk of the cyber town when I wasn’t there, then when I was there helping new people get acclimated, pointing new providers in the direction of safety information, posting my availability and sharing my unique point of view on being a online message board hooker.

I would occasionally read this local board and when I got an email from friends alerting me to yet another topic about ….me, Jenny. I would read and laugh. They didn’t have anything to talk about without me. They had theories as to what I was doing, where did I go, what happened to me. I wouldn’t have been surprised of there was a betting pool all about me.

Just this morning I was once again alerted to another topic about, you guessed it, ME. Too funny, it’s like im their god, their ruler they have nothing to talk about if im not there good, bad or indifferent… they are speechless, directionless and lost with out me. How sad is that.

Its like im Elvis, im legendary. Soon there will be Jenny sightings all over Kalamazoo Michigan. Apparently I made quite the impression that even after weeks and weeks if removing myself from participation that the main topic if conversation on this small local message board about sex for money is still… JENNY DEMILO.

The funny thing is that I have a pretty high profile. I am a regular participant on a national and well-known review board. I have this blog, which I just took mainstream, and my other blog that is directed at an escort audience. I have ads on national escort mall sights and I participate on other small local boards in other cities. I just stopped posting on THAT board. The one where they have contempt for women, where every other thread’s theme is ”bad whores, bad, bad whores” I really thought no once would notice my absence, I didn’t think I had that big of an influence on the people of that local board. I couldn’t have been more wrong. By removing myself and deciding to not participate I have elevated myself to a much higher status in those small minds and become quite the legend. More talked about, more thought about and more posted about then when I was active and involved… I really am a legendary on this nothing little board… and not only in my own mind!

Time to go buy a bedazzled jumpsuit!

Break it on down

I get asked a lot “who sees escorts”? Most people think its what they see on TV streetwalkers like on HBO’s hookers on the point who see convicts who just need to bust a nut after being locked up for 7 to10. I guess thats one element but i've never experienced it.

In my experience it really breaks down like this …

90% are married or involved men. They are missing something in their relationships (intimacy, sex, variety maybe all of it) and they rationalize to themselves that it’s not “cheating” because they are paying for it.

The guy who’s crossing it off their list of things to do, like skydiving. If it were legal he’d go once in a while. He’s usually single and in a dating dry spell. The casual user ;)

The guys who would never get laid without it. Nice guys, NO game. They are uncomfortable around women; they don’t look you in the eye. They will never be the guys who pick up the tasty piece of ass at the bar. So he rents her by the hour.

Then there’s the ones that I do my best to screen out. They always need to tell you how attractive they are. They make a point of letting you know that they don’t “have” to pay for it and usually they're right. They are good-looking guys with lots of game and plenty of charm. They could go out and pick up hot girls every night of the week. They talk the talk and walk the walk. They call an escort because they are lazy. As a result they are resentful they have a “service me” attitude they are lazy lovers and treat you like a whore. yuck.

They are your brothers, your husbands, your fathers, and your sons. They are rich, poor and everything in between. They are of every color of the human rainbow All kinds of men hire escorts.

If they didn’t... i'd be out of a job!

I Dont Care!

Don't tell me how cute you are! whats even worse, don't abbreviate it in an email to VGL. Ugh i hate that.

I'm a freaking ESCORT. Do you really think that telling me you're a hot guy will impress me? Maybe get you a discount? separate you from the crowd? because it doesn't. It only serves to make you look like a tool when you come on to an escort that way. It always makes me dread further communication with you. reg flag, red flag!

If appearances mattered to me do you really think i could show up sight unseen on your doorstep and make sweet, sweet love to you? or fuck you 12 ways to Sunday? provided of course that was your preference ;)

Do you really think you're the only attractive man to ever cross my path in my life as an escort? i have celebrity clients (we all do) Rock-stars pay for my time, Authors of best sellers, powerful men who run empires on occasion pay for a tasty bite of Jenny D. Never once have any of them felt the need to tell me how "good looking" they were.

What matters is how you TREAT me. Are you a nice guy, a respectful guy, a clean guy, a kind guy. Are you going to be respectful of my (very limited) boundaries? Are you going to be happy I'm there to share an intimate moment with you and looking to have a good time? or are you expecting me to put on the big show and be as fake as you are? i prefer REAL people not fake people and real people look all different kinds of ways. Fake people always gotta tell ya how hot they are.

I'm a GFE escort, a courtesan, a temptress and a muse. I'm in the happiness business. I do my best to make EVERYONE who crosses my path a happy, happy man, regardless of what the shell looks like on the outside. What you look like doesn't matter, how you treat me does.

Appearances are deceiving and those that get too wrapped up in them are often deceived!

Vote with your wallet

You hear it time and time again. You don't like a providers why of handling her business..
vote with your wallet

You don't like a providers price structure...
vote with your wallet

You don't like a providers website...
vote with your wallet

You don't like what a provider says in her blogs...
vote with your wallet.

Its great advice, providers are in this business to make money. Yeah you will hear the old "i just love to fuck" line thrown around and many of us do love to fuck but we are in this for the cash not the sex. the sex (when its good) is a bonus.

So you don't like provider or how she handles her business, vote with your wallet. Do not patronise her, do not pass go do not collect 200 dollars. It's as simple as that. if your way of thinking is the majority you will soon see that provider fade away or change how she does things because her business is falling off.

Don't dog her on the review boards at every turn and make an ass out of yourself, don't rant and rave and scream and yell. Simply vote with your wallet. Its easy to do and effective. Promote the providers you do enjoy, the ones who handle their business how you like or think they should.

Oh wait the ones screaming and yelling and ranting and raving like lunatics, the ones who feel so powerless in their own lives that they have to chase around providers on review boards and be snide and nasty to feel like a man with power, they NEVER vote with their wallets...why?

Because there is nothing in them to vote with, being an asshole is all those guys have.

Maybe those "hobbyists" (and i use that term loosely) need to start scrap booking that hobby is very affordable

I Fuck For Money

I Fuck For Money... but that doesn't make me less of a person.

I'm really getting tired of the self righteous attitudes of those that see/interact with providers. The men/clients/keyboard warriors that think because "i fuck for money" that its okay to treat me like less of a person.

I don't have feelings... how could i, i fuck for money
I have no family or friends who love me... how could i, i fuck for money.
I don't have dreams, hopes, desires... how could i, i fuck for money.

women who who fuck for money are not real. You can treat us however you want and no one will know its really YOU who's doing it.

You can seek your revenge on the high school girl who snubbed you, the checker at the market who wouldn't date you, the college girlfriend who fucked your best friend, the wife who despises you. all you need is a screen name and finally you can feel powerful, if only for a brief moment while your typing hunched over in the dark while your wife and 2 kids are asleep.

I have a big mouth. i speak my mind. i never mince words. I'm not very diplomatic... i just never have been. I was the 7 year old that stood up in a friends church and called bullshit when they tried to tell me that "all women were sinners" so now that I'm grown and have somehow ended up being a provider (a damn good one BTW) I need to change who i am to placate the same small minds and backward attitudes I've been battling all my life?

If i wanted to have to be diplomatic in my dealings with small minds i would have stayed in advertising with the rest of the corporate whores.

Yet i get labeled a trouble maker when i, point out the obvious, fight back or god forbid, speak my mind. I'm not a troublemaker, I'M A FUCKING MALCONTENT.

My name is Jenny DeMilo and i am a message board hooker

Kisses,
Jenny