Meet and Greets- the new place to get arrested!

There was a meet and greet busted in Houston recently. (Yeah Houston was busted again). Meet and greets are like cocktail parties where potential clients and working escorts can get together and meet and mingle. There are all different kinds of parties Many are very tame like your typical office cocktail party all the way to a full on orgy, though those are pretty rare these days and usually very hard to get an invite too.

The typical meet and greet is much like any other business networking get together. People of like minds meet at a public restaurant, bar, banquet hall and have a few cocktails and exchange contact info for get togethers on later dates. I understand why these are popular with the men. They get to see the girls in person, no need to interpret the photos on her site. Often girls who blur their face show up. The girls are there to gain new business. They will flirt with you and try to charm you into committing to book a session with them. So yeah they guys love them, especially the guys who never or rarely book with girls. Why book when you can go to a meet and greet play a little grab ass have the girl cater to you , flirt with you and charm you. You get all you need by going to the party. Meet and Greets are always full of lookie loos.

These parties can often have a theme, I for instance host a meet and greet with a toys4tots theme most holiday years. I didn't this year and I'm glad I didn't after hearing about what happened in Houston last week.

A Houston toys4tots meet and greet was busted and raided by the cops. A local Houston message and review board was infiltrated by law enforcement for 4 months prior and they busted the party. Peoples faces were splashed all over the news, girls and guys were handcuffed and put in paddy wagons (which are not fun like pussy wagons) and hauled away for attending a cocktail party. Now its not illegal to go to a party, its not illegal to say i like hookers and go to a party, its not illegal to say I'm an escort and go to a party. But the Houston cops had spent 4 months building a case against these people. Likely collecting salacious messages on the message board, reviews, naughty incriminating comments and the like.

My guess is there was some kinda raffle in place to raise money for toys for tots. I've seen this done on the small boards before when they are trying to raise cash for an event, person who is sick and needs helps, etc. Girls donate services, guys buy tickets, proceeds go to the cause. If you did that at a meet and greet to raise money for say Toys4tots.... will THAT would be prostitution and THAT is illegal.

I'm sure the bulk of those cases wont stick, especially of people keep their fat mouths shut and don't make deals to roll over or freak out. Its a publicity gag, it makes for a good story. How did the TV cameras get there to splash those peoples faces on the news? Why the police called them and told them to get ready for some good footage and a good story. It makes it look like the police in Houston are doing their jobs if they bust a bunch of consenting adults attending a cocktail party and bringing toys for needy kids! Way to go spending all those tax payer dollars Houston PD!

The concern is this though, its not hard to infiltrate any online community if you have a small amount of savvy and a lot of patience. I've been expecting it to happen and it finally did. If it happened in Houston, it can happen anywhere. Lookie loos have been doing it for years, of they can do it anyone can. As prostitution becomes more and more online focused that's where the police will go to make their busts and to keep their numbers up. Do you want your face on the local news because you wanted to play a little grab ass with a hooker or because you wanted to try to book one more hour appointment that week? is it worth the risk.

Not for me and i wont be going to any meet and greets for a very long time... I don't need to be on the news... nope not me.

How to never get a reference from Jenny DeMilo

Part of being an escort that cares about other escorts safety is being reference friendly. What that means is an escort will ask a potential client for another lady he's visited to vouch for him. The potential client gives the new lady the contact info of the lady vouching him and then she emails her asking for the reference.

I've been reference friendly since I began as an escort, I'm always happy to help a lady and a client out by doing my part to keep everyone safe. I rarely have an issue, the ladies I've dealt with when I requested a reference have pretty much been polite, responsive and friendly. Of course I know that they are doing me a personal favor by giving me the reference and I make sure when contacting them that I show my appreciation, making sure to give them all the info they will need, including my own so they can verify my legitimacy. Making it as easily as possible for them. They are not required to do me this favor and taking that approach has worked like a charm. I pretty much never have issue getting references from other escorts.

When giving out a reference I have on a few occasions had to ask ladies for additional information but not very often. Usually its from a new girl. I just ask for more info, she gets to me then I'm able to help her out. I never give a reference if I'm not 100% sure of who shes asking about. Which brings me to today's issue. I finally had my first problem trying to help another girl out with a reference. Yeah i said in giving another girl a reference I had an issue trying to help her out.

Some escort emailed me asking for a reference, I was not at home where I could access the info she needed but I wrote her back right away from my iPhone telling her I wasn't near the info and that id get it to her as soon as I was able to get back home. When I got home I was able to verify the info and give her the reference. So I got back to her with the thumbs up on the client in less then 5 hours.

Next I hear from my client that he had used me as a reference but the girl was saying I never got back to her and was there an issue with me vouching for him? Since i had responded to the only reference i got for him, I asked him to tell her to send in the request again. I was the same girl she sent in another request and this time I cc'd the client with my vouch so he would know I got back to her. This time I was able to get her the reference within the hour.

Today a week later, I heard from her a third time asking her if it was my policy not to give references, as "a few potential clients" had given me as a reference and I hadn't gotten back to her. I wrote her back AGAIN and told her I had given her the references. I thought maybe her email wasn't working correctly because she had never responded to any of my return emails to say thanks (like most girls do) and i had cc'd the only client she asked me about and he responded so he know I vouched for him. I went to her website, filled out her contact form and told her I had sent in the refs and for her to check her hosting and spam folder.

I never heard back from her regarding the web form email, so i gave her a call to let her know there was an email issue. Not being anywhere near a work phone I had to call from a blocked number and figured if I got voice mail I would leave a message. To my surprise she answered the blocked call. it went like this....

ring ring...
Her: CAN YOU CALL FROM AN UNBLOCKED NUMBER!!
Me: I cant this is Jenny DeMilo you asked me for a reference
Her: click

Yup she hung up on me. She asked me to do her a favor, then she hung up on me. I called back and left her a not so nice voice mail telling her to stop telling clients I didn't reference them that I had and her email was fucked up.

This whole incident really got under my skin so I waited a bit figuring she would get the voice mail realize the blocked caller was another escort she wanted a reference from and I gave her another call. She yelled again upon answering the blocked call and before I could say "do you want the reference or not" she hung up on me. So i called a third time left her a voice mail telling her she had a lot of nerve and to not ask me for any favors in the future.

Then the emails began from her. I swear this bitch is crazy, she sent me several chastising emails. Really? You ask me for a favor, I do that favor and you email me and scold me? So my response was short and sweet something to the affect of don't contact me again and ask for any favors, you crazy bitch, I might have suggested she get off the pipe too.

I don't know where some people get the nerve. I know a lot of cracked out crazy whores are attracted to this business but I usually am able to steer clear of them, at least I try to. This crazy ho took the cake. I thought clients had entitlement issues, this twat was worse then any client who thought I owed them something for nothing.

umm well you dumb cunt, I don't owe you shit your emails are now banished to the cornfield... fuck you and happy holidays :)

I might be a Whore but I'm not a Hole

The email came in like any other, a response to an ad i had placed in a city, in another state i was visiting. However i hadn't received one like this in a while...

"need you by 9:00 pm tonight. if too much bullshit, foreget about it."

Well where do i sign up! emails like this usually just go straight into the trash because lets be honest I'm not a hole don't i don't enjoy being treated as one. That's exactly what this email does, let me break it down.

1. no salutation or greeting- devoid of using my name ( to further dehumanize me)
2. a demanding i need you by 9pm tonight inquiry (with no mention of screening info)
3. "if its to much bullshit..." (again implies screening with be an issue, in fact it implies everything will be an issue)
4. miss spelling of "forget" (to much trouble to even run a spell check)

Those are just the glaringly obvious red flags on this play. This goes deeper, there are two types of guys that send these kinds of emails and its my job to figure which camp i think this little piece of email joy fits into.

1. socially unaware - has ZERO idea of how to speak to women let alone escorts.
2. men who hate women

lets take the socially unaware guys. He sends an email with no social graces because he has none. No greeting, no reference to anything i request on my booking form, no info about himself, no reference actually reading my site, he probably didn't. He saw a picture, he grunted and sent the email (well at least he didn't call) If i thought the email was in this camp i could send him back an email asking for more info draw him out and see where could lead, it could turn into a successful appointment but id be aware meeting this guy in person, he would also have no social graces face to face.

Men who hate women. He hates women and treats them disrespectfully even in an email because they are all whores... yanno just like his mother. To him escorts are just a hole and you never have to be kind or polite to a hole. You don't read a holes website to get a feel from it to see if you are a good fit, cuz all you wanna do is fit your dick in a hole. You don't politely ask if you are available on short notice by 9pm this evening because you are in a tight schedule, you send a one line demand and add the caveat that "if" its to much bullshit "foreget" about it and you don't even take the time to run a spell check over it, i mean why? you're emailing a hole not a person.

It was pretty easy for me to see this email for what it was immediately and which group Mr Charm belonged to and i responded accordingly - i refuse to be treated like a hole and i will weed your dumb ass out in a heartbeat. I might be a whore but I'm not a hole and i still have and always will have the choice as to who i will share my time and body with. As much as that chaps the women haters hides i don't care, even us whores have the right to refuse them and we do... all the time.

But, but, but .. you're a whore!

So I've been reading the hooker message boards and zeroing in on this months latest trend. Men upset that the "whores" wont service them. But you're a whore you HAVE to see anyone who will pay you. You don't have choices because you're a whore. You cant refuse me for being a entitled ass hat because you're a WHORE

whore whore whore whore!

I'm quite sure i know what it is a do for a living, i mean i am the one fucking strangers in hotels for greenbacks but thanks for the reminder. The real question is, what is up with these guys? Have they been refused by the "whores" a lot? doubtful, my guess is they are the guys who when they were young men maybe in high-school maybe when thy were a little older who's greatest fear with women was/is... rejection.

They feel powerless, they are not comfortable engaging women in a real way and have eventually found themselves in the pay for play game. Because they feel that when they pay they have the power and the fact that a WHORE could reject them is one of their greatest fears. To get rejected by a women who gets paid to be there is so scary to them that they go on a rampage on message boards to try to get though to these whores and their supporters they they whores shouldn't have a choice so that they will never be in the position to be rejected by one. So they act out anonymously on message boards because if they used their real"handles" they whores might not see them so they have to do it from behind a mask and berate the whores, incite them men who generally like the whores and stomp their little feet and gnash their little teeth.

if it didn't get so tiresome or wasn't so pathetic, I'd find it funny.

it can be hurtful no matter how thick your skin is to be denigrated by a segment of a community who really should be more supportive since they engage in the same activities be it on the other side of the fence. Sex workers are often terribly put down by society we are not accepted and its disheartening when we are not accepted by our own. it can grate on you and often does.

I'm sure I'm just being an uppity whore.

Clients 1-8. Im hitting Albany 22-26th

I'm going back out on the road.

I'm trying to arrange my life so i don't have to work here at my home base and by work i mean dirty, nasty, fuck and suck work. I'd like to do that just on the road and keep my time here at home in beautiful Los Angeles just me working on my photo career and then if escort work comes my way, so be it but i don't want to have to chase escort work on my home turf anymore. Those are lofty aspirations i know especially in these economic times but they are my aspirations none the less.

I'm heading out to Albany NY, that's right Spitzer country to see clients 1-8 and maybe 10-100 who knows... i could get lucky. I have never been to NY's state capital before as the last time i was planning on going i had to last minute cancel for family reasons. I'm excited about the trip but not about the air travel. Seems unless you own your own jet air travel from LA to Albany SUCKS ASS. Yep layovers, bad airlines, long travel times. So i will travel at night, try to sleep with the aid of magic sleep inducing pills and hope for the best.

A friend of mine Heather should be close to the area during a couple days of my trip June 22nd-26th so i get to hang out with her, that should be fun as shes a rad chick. I'm also hoping for another friend to come visit though i think that ones a long shot because getting to me all the way in NY when hes no where near it will take much effort. So as much as id like to play a little on this trip i will be working most of the time. Its also supposed to rain the whole time i there. Just as it gets to look like summer here in LA i go to NY where is rainy and gloomy. it figures.

I'm planning some other new and exciting summer destinations, since those aren't set in stone and will take a little funding and planning I'm not ready to announce it yet. But i will soon....

Julissa...

A sex worker in Boston is dead. She was killed by a potential client who's it is believed has been robbing ladies in Boston for a while. When this young women fought back he shot her in the chest several times and left her for dead and die she did. This was in a nice hotel in the Back Bay in Boston. Boston is a city I've been to on tour and will go back to.

Some specifics: she advertised "massages" on Craigslist, she was a young and beautiful girl and by all accounts this was her secret life. Her name was Julissa Brisman.

They have connected this murder to two other robberies (one just a couple days after he killed Julissa) though i know this man has robbed more then just two women. Hes been on the radar of ladies in the area for a while, he is young attractive blond man of about 6 feet tall. And according to a CIA profiler i saw on the news hes on a "spree" he wont stop until caught.

Over a year ago really closer to two years now, in California there was a guy who was beating, robbing, choking out countless sex workers and leaving them for dead. He finally seceded in killing a girl in orange county. I personally knew one girl who was badly injured and knew though the web two others who were attacked and beaten. It wasn't really on the news, the local industry message boards didn't seem to really care and kept removing warnings about the guy with some lame excuse about protecting their own liability. Meanwhile girls were being hurt.

The guy was finally caught.

When the Boston story broke, It was the lead in teaser for my NBC LOCAL 11pm News here in L.A. The actual story was about 15 minutes into the evening news after the first break. They didn't say the girls were sex workers they said they put "racy" ads up on Craigslist. So that's how the media here in LA was first framing the story.

I found it strange that it was on my local news but not unhappy about the word getting out. I don't know why this story is getting national headlines, i don't know if the media is more tolerant of sex workers because in the last two years we've been more public. There's a major studio movie coming out about sex workers, (The Girlfriend Experience) Showtime had their second season of Secret Diary Of A Call Girl. Not to mention there are interviews and articles popping up showing sex work in a more positive light and not always as drugged out street walkers with pimps who are wearing their childhood abuse on their sleeve. Oh and of course prop K in S.F. That brought a lot of attention to the sex workers as normal people movement.

The guy in Boston was likely targeting sex workers because he felt that they wouldn't be able to go to the police. Also he had access to women alone he could over power. It's what we all fear and why we have safety precautions, screening process and safe calls. We have to know who it is we are seeing, there are many men out there who balk and are uncomfortable giving up their personal info and many who will berate you for just asking for it, they don't understand why they need to give up their info just for the opportunity to spend time with a pretty girl but Julissa's tragic death underscores why we ask for it.

Our lives could depend on it.

Busted In Houston Texas

Another big escort agency got busted. This time in Houston. The last big bust was in Arizona. this time a couple was arrested for running the "prostitution ring" and it was another long investigation, 2 years long, that's long. The female owner called herself the "Heidi Fleiss" of Huston. lets hope not Heidi got busted for having a big mouth and has since fallen into hard, hard times and looks like she will never recover. Drug addiction will do that to you. I have always had a soft spot for Heidi, our paths have crossed much over my lifetime and though i would never presume to call her a "friend" maybe a long ago before i was ever an escort frenemy would be more appropriate title. I hope some day she really does get it together and can live the rest of her life out happy and healthy.

So back to Houston. Its funny because i was just doing some research into Texas for touring, and i was on the fence about going there. With ASPD the local Texas escort website being down for months after their hacking and the fact that rates tend to be lower in Texas i wasn't sure it was for me. Now with this latest news i know I'm not going to tour Texas. This very well could shut down Houston for escorts for quite a while if it really is as big a bust as the media is making it out to be. Az is a dead state and hasn't even come close to bouncing back after the huge bust there last year.

The backlash of this will be the "screening issue" the cops in Houston has this agencies client list. They are making much hulabalu out of it, its large (1500 names large) and as will all guys that can afford 350 a pop or more to see a hooker, its reported to have some prominent Houston names on it.

It makes clients or potential clients scared to screen in fear that their name will be on a client list in the future. Lets get a few things straight, when you use an agency to see a hooker, you take on certain risks, mostly the risk is of a bait and switch or upsell situation, because most agencies are not flat fee legit gfe agencies. However there are some out there and with those your risk is that they screen you to make sure you are not law enforcement or a crazy kookoo who wants to hurt their girls. Which they should do, that's good business and its safety driven. Here's the downside though, Agencies look like a tasty yummy dessert to Law enforcement. They love to bust them. They look good to their communities for "cleaning them up" and they they make a HUGE media splash, it looks like they are doing their job and earning their paychecks. That is a major consideration that most clients don't take into consideration when they call an escort agency. Its the one they should consider the most if they are worried that their name in the local paper on a "johns list" might i don't know... ruin their marriages and lives.

In contrast that risk is not something you take on when you give your screening info to a legit reputable INDEPENDENT provider. No police agency is going to spend 2 years of tax payer money spear heading an investigation into one little independent girl for a misdemeanor prostitution bust where she will be released in most cases on a 250.00 bond or ORO in 24 hours, provided shes got no warrants or priors. I'm not saying there is no risk, there is never NO risk in this game.The trick is to minimize the risk weigh the consequences . So if the consequences of your name being on an agencies "trick list" is too much for you then keep it in your pants and screw your wife or take a calculated lesser risk and see an independent escort with a good reputation.

yanno... like me.

Hit The Road Jack...

I decided to start touring earlier then i previously planned. I'm going out on the road in a few days with the ever perky Audrey Trouble. I got ancy and twitchy to get started, what can i say. So first stop is Boston, MA. I've never been and though it will be extra cold ( i mean extra, extra cold for a Cali girl like me) i want to try to get out and do at least one Boston-ish kinda thing. I don't want my first trip to be just seeing the 4 walls of my hotel... and a lot of cock. However I have no idea what to do. Should i see something historical, or go to a famous Boston restaurant, reenact the Boston tea party in my panties and fuck me pumps? I'm sure i will figure it out eventually. I know while I'm there I'm gonna take some snappies (that's photos to the unaware) of Heather Jana, local Bostonian hottie for hire, so that will be fun.

After Boston ... Vegas. Always a fun place for me. I'll be there the week after Superbowl plus it's the week of the concrete and tile conventions. That means manly men will abound and those types really do appreciate a dirty girl like myself.

After Vegas I'm home for a little bit and i get to spend some quality time with the pooch... oh and the main man before i head out once again to places unknown and destinations exotic.. okay maybe just destinations Midwestern.

I just hope i dont see a man on the wing of the plane, cuz that would be a nightmare at 20,000 feet.

Entitlement begins its consuming grind

There are rules for ad postings on message boards about hookers. They all vary to some degree or another but there are rules. Escorts must adhere to such rules or risk banishment and lose the ad venue or be subject to ridicule and public scolding by those tho know the rules inside and out. The rules are often hard to find.

I've been noticing a trend on several boards, Hobbyists (johns, tricks, clients whatever you want to call them) posting derogatory insulting comments on a escorts ad thread. The slant seems to be "you charge too much, don't you know there's a recession!!" with a good portion of "you fucking whore" implied though some don't imply the last part but come right out in say it. Classy.

A recession? really? wow i was too busy doing my nails and playing with my perpetually wet snatch to watch the news or pay attention to the world around me to notice, you don't say.

The escorts I KNOW all knew about the recession long before the disgruntled nasty comment backlash started or before the word was uttered on the evening news. Escorts are more tuned in to the ebb and flow of cash flow then any other business people i know. Seriously, they really are.

What amazes me is how these disgruntled message board cry babies think that by brow beating some escort trying to make a living by hanging her shingle out (the ad thread) will work. As if suddenly the lady is going to say oh yeas Mr. anonymous troll let me give you my services for free because i know how hard it must be for YOU out in the real world. As if WE don't live in the real world too. Its the sense entitlement i don't get. Not the disappointment that they cant afford to pay for prime pussy, i understand the disappointment. I get disappointed too when i cant afford something i want. I either forgo it or save up for it. I don't go into Tiffany's and bitch the sales people out because theres a recession on and they should lower their fucking prices because I NEED to wear that bracelet. When in actuality i don't. I can easily not wear it, just as these message board shit talkers can easily not fuck a whore.

They feel entitled to publicly bitch and moan, they try to get other shit talkers to join the fray, they try to get the lady to join the fray. If she does try to defend herself they further attempt to say "see that nasty whore doesn't deserve to get paid, cuz shes got a the nerve to defend her business" oh and they bash any male who thinks being a loud mouthed rude prick on a message board makes all hobbyists look bad.

I see this going a couple ways, its going to get worse as more men who used to be able to easily afford to screw escorts realize that they can less and less if at all, so the disgruntled will become more vocal. I also see the ladies not sitting back and taking it, its harder out there for everyone and yes that includes escorts. When you get limited access to advertise and that advertisement is sullied by some angry little man and his personal financial issues, it very likely will lead to more ladies not taking the high road and waiting for next weeks ad to go smooth but to taking on these shit talkers head to head.

So its going to get a lot nastier...mark...my...words...

So you wanna be a hooker?

Every time there's a big mainstream media article about Hookers i get contacted by young hopefuls asking for advice on how to get into the game of pay for play companionship. With Radars recent debacle (hipster hookers my ass) the amount of mail I'm getting asking for advice is off the hook. So to save myself from having to repeat myself over and over to inquiring minds i thought id share some of my words of wisdom, advice, warnings, ramblings or what ever you wanna call it.

My first bit of advice is: DON'T DO IT.
There are girls who have stellar reviews and long standing reputations who are not making ends meat right now. Wanting to get into the escort business at this time is like wanting to get into the employment game after 911, there is little work. The economy is bad and its an election year which always causes work to cease.

If you still want to brave the bad economy and heavy competition here are some things to think about.

Get a professional website: Make sure you have a stats package so you can see where your referring hits are coming from. This will be really helpful, you can see where you advertising efforts ie dollars are paying off and converting to clicks to your site. You want to work smarter not harder.

Get professional pictures: Makes all the difference in the world. Classy pictures attract, classy clients. Skanky pictures ... well you get the picture.

What will you do for money: Don't let anyone talk you out of your comfort zone ... ever.

Screen Clients: You need a way to be sure someone is who he says he is so you don't get into trouble and you need to make sure someone isn't scary to see. This is VERY important, always screen potentials. You need to become a JR private eye. You must be 100% sure of who you are seeing, if they don't screen, then don't see them. Never drop your guard no matter how broke you are. Don't get greedy.

Watch the competition: http://www.eros-guide.com look at the ads for the girls in your area, see what they charge how they present themselves. Who do you want to be?

Treat it like a business: Be professional in your dealings with others. Investments of time and money are necessary to be successful, as with any business.

Keep your personal information PERSONAL: Be careful who you trust, its an isolating business, it can get tough, you often feel like you live in a bubble and will want to reach out to others in the subculture. Chose your friends wisely. This is a cut throat business and there are lots of people who are nuts attracted to it. You are who your friends are to some degree, someone else's rep can spill over to you. Someone with your personal information can really hurt you. I was outed, its not fun, it can be devastating.

Don't quit your day job: Living off the grid is difficult, you want to appear as normal as possible. Its tiring to be an escort and have a day job but in the long run you will have more to show for it.

Besides all that, i go back to my first bit of advice... I don't recommend ANYONE do this.

It's not easy money, you work HARD for it and it takes a toll on you physically and emotionally. It makes real interpersonal relationships hard... for most, impossible. You have to lie to the people you love and care about on a daily basis and that is a very hard thing to do, it gets much harder over time, living a double life is not easy. Its a risky business (emotionally, physically) if you insist on being an escort you need to work smart and minimize your risk. Not everyone is cut out to do this, you have to be able to compartmentalize your emotions, you have to be able to reject societies stigma, its not glamour and glitz, it has its moments but this is job and a job with real risks.

Escorts are risk managers, we have to be its how we survive.

Radar Blows It Again

I was gonna leave this one alone on my blog since I've been commenting on it all over the innerweb on other blogs and on the article itself but I've been getting a lot of email so i thought i would pony on up with some thoughts on radars latest look into the sex for cash biz.

As some of you know i enjoy Radar Magazine, I've been Quoted in it, I've worked with a writer there on another possible upcoming story but the last couple of "hooker" oriented stories makes me wonder... what the hell happened to Radar? First they publish a mean spirited bunch of drivel making up a premises for Ashley Dupree's new reality series, written by top misogynist Alex Balk. He writes of the "whores" with such spittle vigor you'd think he had a personal stake in it, or maybe just not enough Mommy love as a child.

Then Radar publishes the latest bit of wonderment about the sex for money biz titled "Secrets of a Hipster Hooker" it supposedly a first person look at the high end hooker game in NYC, where the author crosses the line and attempts to turn a trick but runs out on the client in the end (yeah i know spoiler) I swear you have a more honest look at the sex for money biz watching Harold Robbins' mini series 79 Park Avenue. I've been all over the web commenting how this fluff and turn piece is just a bunch of made up BULLSHIT.

Other blogs of note are also commenting on Radars latest guffaw and have some interesting takes on the piece, making great observations. Susannah Breslin of The Frisky says "the realities of sex work are far too hardcore for most aspiring “hipster hookers” to handle" and she couldn't be more right.

Monica of the Spread Blog goes into depth and just tears it up, in the process makes a keen observation I think the idea of putting yourself out there as a (possible) consumable piece of merchandise is gratifying, and talking about in an article is in many ways an attempt to publicly confirm your fuckability

Even the Valley Wag gets into the mix, Melissa Gira Grant reports on it by saying "She went it at like a novelist-wannabe temp showing up for a stint as a file clerk".

Most of these tend to give the writer the benefit of the doubt and play along with her story as if its real. I still think its total and complete bullshit. Salon talks about how she wrote this piece and then shopped it around. I think they mean watched a lot of Showtime and did a little innerweb blog search, read a romance novel or two then wrote it and shopped it but hey thats just my take on it.

You think that any media outlet buying it would either...
a) Label it the fiction it is
b)FACT CHECK IT

But nooooo then how would they get their made up view of hookers. All of us making 300,00 bucks per year and keeping our money in gold bars (doesn't everyone have a stash of gold bullion?) carrying 1,000 handbags and having great high powered day jobs. All our clients are the wealthy, young, rich, banker types who lavish us with tips in original art work by recognized artists. Then once again they force feed us the same old tired bullshit to justify and explain why young ladies get into sex work.... its empowering. ahhhhhh BULLSHIT.

Peridotash ex-escort and current Domme has a recent blog entry where she asks sex workers the Three top reasons they do what they do.. No surprise the number one answer... MONEY. Empowerment is the fantasy justification as to why some women choose to fuck for money. Its the same old line of bullshit, "its not the money, its the sex", "I'm not money motivated...I'm just horny" :::giggle:: :::hair flip::: Anyone who has honestly talked to a hooker when shes getting off her 4th trick for the day and he was a smelly, small dicked, pushy, weasel of a man who kept tuning her nipples in like they were radio dials until they were sore, will tell you... that the empowerment angle, is utter and complete bullshit.

I have to hand it to Radar they really out did themselves on this one.. F minus!

Gettin Phished

It happens sometimes, usually its some dim witted bacon and donuts type that thinks I'm going to express in a private IM conversation that i will do XXX sex act for XXX dollar amount. I wont on the phone, or email and they want to do an end run around, thinking that i'll some how incriminate myself in an IM. Good luck on that one. The men in blue have a specific way about them and I'm always extra cautious anyways, i find them out pretty fast. Plus they could never pass screening and i ALWAYS screen.

The other day i got phished and i first thought i was a a man in a uniform, but then it took a turn that made me believe it was someone just fucking with me, looking for personal information about yours truly. This person who was "new to the hobby"knew too much, for someone "new" they ask pointed questions under the guise of being a fumbling newbie. Like i would somehow give them some kernel of personal info i don't give out to potential clients. That i would slip up and give them the little golden nugget they were looking for... AS IF.

My favorite portion of this fleeting online conversation was when he told me how nice i seemed in an effort to butter me up when i was being a reserved, suspicious, non responsive, bitch. yeah dead give away...

oh well seems my "fan club" is still out there with too much time on their hands, i hope they enjoyed my bad spelling and bitchy attitude!

Vocalizing

He was visibly nervous and shaking like a leaf. I found it kinda amusing... at first. I tried to calm hi down a bit by speaking slowly, touching his arm when i spoke and remaing cool, calm and collected myself. as we got the small talk portion of the evening out of the way, I looked around the room spotted my envelope (i always like to know where it is) and noticed that there were no pictures on the walls and that all his belongings (books and video tapes) were ushered into piles in the 4 corners of the room. I asked him if he had lived there long as the place didn't look very lived in. he'd been there over 2 years.

I took him by the hand and asked him to take me to bed. His hands were sweaty and the shaking was still there. Again i did my best to calm him down but at this point i knew it was futile. he was oddly aggressive but scared to death. I tried to take the lead to set the pace but i finally gave up and let myself be the zombie rag doll he was looking for. He was obviously not well practised in the art of the female body but wanted to make sure he got all the high points in. i obliged as best i could.

when it came time to wrap it up and go for the gold he amateurishly pulled me to the edge of the bed so he could penetrate me while standing up.. umm okay I've always been a fan of that and when he slid inside me i decided to be quite vocal, and put on the big show, i know that's what he wanted and honestly try as i could i just couldn't get into the sex this time. it took him about 3 strokes to cum. he later told me it was because i was so vocal. Note to self nervous guys cum fast when you moan like a porn star. I can only imagine how fast it would have been if i had started to get into some dirty talk. Maybe my filthy mouth could i have gotten him to cum before he actually attempted to fuck me ....

i grabbed my envelope and headed for the door with a kiss on the cheek for him and 400 dollars for me.. he will call again. the nervous ones always do.

Gettin' it all done in time

A girlfriend and i were talking about appointment lengths, she was considering extending her 1 hour to a 90 min minimum she was having issues with getting in everything within the allotted hour. It reminded me about another working girl friend of mine who says she knows exactly how much time has lapsed in an appointment to within a couple minutes. She's not looking at a clock or a watch or anything, she's just really good at perceiving time.

Time is always an issue, no one wants a "clock-watcher" but this is a timed event so there is a balance to achieve and a skill to getting everything in within the hour. I think I learned how to manage my time well when i was working in advertising. You had so much to do and so little time to get it done but you also didn't want to look like you were panicked and flustered. That would only come back to bite you in the ass a million different ways in that nasty world.

With a client you need to be able to converse, charm, flirt, make out, get oral, get down, relax, chat and give it a second go, all within one short hour. That's a lot to do in 60 mins but its not brain surgery, its sex and human interaction. Some clients make it easy for ya, they are charming, flirtatious and ready to go go go. Others are nervous and awkward and you need to gently coax it out of them. The real job here is to get clued into what the clients expectations are early on so that you have enough time left to meet them, or in my case attempt to exceed them. yeah yeah, I can't help it I'm an overachiever. If you are observant and looking you will find those cues and clues hunt them down like youre Nancy Drew and once you figure them out you're good to go. then getting all the highlights in in time is easy.

Once in a while i might go over time because i lose track of it. Yes, i can can fall victim to a charming man once in a while or i get so entranced by an interesting conversation or person that i realize the times almost up and i haven't even gotten naked yet. A certain fascinating malpractice attorney comes to mind, i will of course stay over to make sure i leave my companion a happy, happy man. For the most part an hour is plenty of time to get it all the required high notes in, the more you do this the keener your sense of time gets. I went over a lot more then i was just starting out and still in the middle of the very big learning curve then i do now. With any job the more you do it the more efficient you are at it. I personally prefer a 2 hour or longer tryst with my gentlemen callers because then the pressure if off entirely to cram everything in a hour time frame, its easier to just go with the flow...

...cuz if you cant seduce a ready and willing man in 2 hours, well you got bigger issues then managing your time!

The Twitter Situation

Twitter refuses to uphold their TOS, denies responsibility or accountability to its users and the backlash is brutal. That's the story in one line but let me delve a little deeper.

Popular blogger and twitter user Ariel Waldman has been harassed. Several online communities/tools/utilities or whatever they would like to call themselves this week are being used to further that harassment. Ariel contacts the powers that be at Twitter and attempts to get them to intervene and uphold their TOS which clearly states.

" You must not abuse, harass, threaten, impersonate or intimidate other Twitter users"

Twitter then cops the fuck out, in a huge way. Ariel blogs about her experience and there is much support. Twitter employees attempt to do some major damage control as this story spreads like wild fire across the blogosphere. They succeed in only making them look more irresponsible. They back peddle and go through a series of excuses. First it appears they say they are afraid to ban the abuser because of lawsuit retribution, then they say they will rewrite their TOS to remove that section because they are not a "community" website but a "utility" website, they then settle on the theory that Ariel wasn't abused enough to take action and uphold their TOS.

You can read all about this here and here and here and here, its everywhere.

http://arielwaldman.com/2008/05/22/twitter-refuses-to-uphold-terms-of-service/
http://getsatisfaction.com/twitter/topics/twitter_refuses_to_uphold_terms_of_service
http://news.cnet.com/8301-13577_3-9951197-36.html
http://www.zeldman.com/2008/05/22/a-tweet-too-far/
http://blog.wired.com/business/2008/05/tweeter-takes-o.html
http://www.briansolis.com/2008/05/twitter-vs-ariel-waldman-when-tos.html
http://blog.twitter.com/2008/05/our-terms.html

Why am i writing about this social network site I'm not a part of nor have any desire to use? because it draws an interesting parallel to a small local provider/hobbyist community site based in OC and LA. They too refused to uphold their TOS when i was harassed by a member(s). I will not be naming them because i refuse to give them any publicity but those in the know .... KNOW who they are.

My harassment was 10 fold to what Ariel describes, i was called a "cunt" on so many occasions i cant keep count, i was accused of all manor of felonies and was chased around their "message board" in an attempt to ruin my reputation and in the escort biz your rep is pretty important. When i reached out to the administration i was denied help. I was told that banning abusive members was "too time consuming" or "futile" because the offending member would just "make a new account" that i should acquire a thicker skin, ignore the constant attacks or to leave the board. They passed the buck and told me to contact my local PD but took no action themselves. After the harassment reached the point where my real name was posted in their site, my personal information investigated and passed around though their system and links to my real life posted, I asked a high level administrator face to face what had to happen before they would take action and i got brushed off and shrugged off with the same "its futile" answer. I also came to know that while much of this harassment was going on one of the administrators of the site was involved. When i would write the anonymous "admin" account asking for intervention that often the one doing the harassing was the administrator i was contacting. That administrator was eventually removed because of an incident with another user who happened to be male and a lawyer. I suppose he was taken more seriously then me.

Eventually i opted to not participate on that site any longer because i felt my personal safety was compromised some really crazy things were going on, things i contacted my local PD about. Threats of kidnapping were the scariest. Outing of my personal information and the harassment i suffered on a daily basis really made it not worth it. I thought id take the out of sight out of mind approach. It continued without my presence on the board and does to this day. To date and to my knowledge no one has been censured, chastised reprimanded or admonished in any way for this behavior.

Recently the same site made a move at reinvention they now officially call themselves a "social networking site" my belief is they are trying to shield themselves from liability from running a prostitution message board. They now have a way to collect money to run the site and have a "community moderation" feature where you can delete members or silence them if enough of the community agree on the action. However that "feature" doesn't not abate them from responsibility or accountability to their users as they would like members to believe. This particular site has degenerated into a huge cluterfuck of nastiness. All it is, is people being abusive to each other, its painful to read.

There are situations where the administration will intervene and delete messages, silence members or delete accounts. There are 3 unspoken rules, they are listed no where on their site you're expected to "just know them" if you discuss law enforcement, drug usage, or that you have met other members of the site at a social function your posts mysteriously disappear. However on that site you are free to board stalk, demean, insult and harass other members with no recourse.

Its much more extreme then the Twitter situation but it boils down to the same core issue... Social Networking sites and their responsibility to their users. Some seem to want to not be responsible at all, they make excuses and don't step up to the plate. Harassment on the Internet is a serious issue and it seems to touch a lot of peoples lives. If you create a service/site/communications tool I submit you DO have a responsibility to your users. If you chose to turn a blind eye because it's too hard of an issue to deal with then you end up with what happened to this local prostitution site i was a member of..... it degenerates into crap, loses its usefulness and people no longer want to be associated with it.

So i again ask the question...what has to happen before this kind of online harassment is taken seriously? Does someone have to die for some of these new social networking sites to address this issue and to be responsible to their membership? They rely on the "its futile" "its only the Internet" "were the messenger" arguments to shield themselves from responsibility but will that really shield them when some thing tragic happens?

I hardly think so and i for one sure hope it never gets to that point but i like others see the writing on the wall.

Are you a cop?

It's one of the more prevalent urban legends in the sex for money game, believing that if you ask an officer of the law straight out "are you a cop?" he or she must answer truthfully and spill his little law enforcement guts. Somehow asking that magic question will free you and you will no longer be eligible to go to the clink for doing something illegal.

Nothing could be further from the truth. Let me make this very clear.. cops are allowed to LIE. they can do all kinda of things when undercover to try to stop the bad guy (in this case consenting adults who want a little transacted naked fun) when working a drug case they can not only sell dope, but use it... what in the world makes people think that on a sex for money sting they couldn't do the same. Though i have been lucky enough to not ever have to come in contact with that side of the biz, i know ladies who have. Cops can touch you, get naked and of course LIE. I personally know a escort who after having sex with the undercover was arrested. Talk about insult to injury, his word against hers. Is that common? doubtful but that doesn't mean it can't and doesn't happen. What they can not do is entrap you, let me rephrase that. If they entrap you (ie though their actions convince you to commit a crime you were not already predisposed to) you have a good chance of getting that charge dropped at court. You still get arrested, finger printed, photographed and you still have to hire a lawyer and go to court. That solicitation charge is still on your record. Expunged records still have a footprint, so even if you go to all the expense and effort to get that charge wiped from your record someone somewhere will be able to see at some point you've been arrested.

fun huh?

Here are some interesting discussions and ridiculing of those who so blindly believe that what they've see on 70's TV shows like Starsky and Hutch and Baretta will save them from a night in the pokie.

Expert Law

Yahoo Answers

Erowid Vaults

Erowid Vaults have the most interesting and prolific one and though their slant is drugs, it's the SAME THING were talking vice.

It all boils down to there is always a risk when you ant to break the law (even a stupid one like prostitution), I'm sure for many that's part of the fun. So minimize your risk as much as you can. Ladies don't take unnecessary chances, screen your potential clients to make sure he's not only a nice guy but is who he says he is. No exceptions to your rules, it keeps you safe and free. Gents do your home work, know who it is you're seeing. That Playboy model who isn't established, doest have a website and is very explicit about her "menu" isn't really going to give you the world and then some for 150 bucks... think with the big head. It's the best way to stay out of trouble and out of the long reach of the law.

Now anyone can get sloppy or make a mistake and get caught up, its not the end of the world, it happens to the best of them.. if it does happen just wear it like a badge of honor....

But don't forget ... there is no magic question that will keep you safe and free, only using your brain can do that!

Americas Next Top Hooker

Who doesn't love Hookers and who doesn't love reality TV! I know i do.

welcome to my new show..... America's Next Top Hooker

The Pitch: a cross between Top Chef and Americas Next Top Model. 10 Ho's from all different parts of the biz, track walkers, Craig's List girls, highly reviewed escorts, high end very expensive courtesans live in a house together and compete in "Ho events" to gain the title "America's Next Top Hooker" oh and some kinda outlandish prize like money (hookers love money)... TBD ;)

The challenge events could get pretty outrageous... but for TV they might have to be toned down. Boo!

Catch Phrase: Every reality based lifestyle career game show needs a catch phrase these days. "you're fired" entered the popular vernacular and will forever be associated with Mr Trump, others maybe haven't fared so well. "this is your last cut" "please pack your knives and go" "you are NOT America's next top model" so a good catch phrase can carry a show. For Americas next top Hooker i suggest these catch phrases... (other suggestions welcome)

1. Take your envelope and go
2. leave the money on the night stand and get out
3. that was your last blow job

Networks: So of course Playboy TV is on the pitch list as well as HBO and Showtime (Showtime is the new HBO anyways) but maybe Comedy Central would have balls big enough to take a risk with this new reality based prostitution game show... even though their budgets are well known for being ridiculously low. The comedy gold possibilities are endless!

I think it could work, its got everything. Sex, sexy girls who will probably hate each other and do nasty shit to each other behind each other backs oh and sex.. of course you will need a crack legal team because anytime there is prostitution in the mix you gotta make sure all bases are covered and no one goes to the clink for a another dumb reality show .... I think the public is ready and with the success of celebrity rehab i think they will eat this new show up... hey America loves dug addicts why not hookers!

I'm pitching it i swear i am... steal my idea and die :)

"Give a man (or a woman) an anonymous account, and he'll eviscerate your self-esteem."

I ran across this article by Violet Blue and it just rings oh so true Blue. As someone who over recent times has been under siege by "anonymous trolls" and some not so anonymous, calling me any manner of terrible names in hopes of trying to make me feel bad about myself, Violets take on the phenomenon is spot on. They can can call you names, they can call you fat, and ugly and try to diminish what it i you have to say by pigeon holing you into some narrow minded view of what is beautiful, As if beauty in and of its self holds the key to everything informative or insightful but they can only try, they can not succeed if you don't let them.

I don't let them... my fat ass makes 4oo an hour, I'm happy with myself and very comfortable in my own skin, which makes me a dedicated and sexy fun escort well worth the price of admission, in fact I'm a goddamned bargain

One more reason why Violet Blue rocks

The Bat Phone!

I try not to put a number in my escort ads though sometimes i do. I prefer to be contacted by email if possible, gives me a chance to screen my new friends and since i was once a "phone girl" for an agency my patience is low for bullshit phone calls.

so today the Bat Phone rings....

Caller: hey baby, i saw your ad on Eros
Me: great, whats your name
Caller: so you have great curves
Me: thanks, whats your name?
Caller: how big is your ass baby
Me: ahh huh?
Caller: how big is your ass baby, ummm yeah how big is your ass
Me: ahhh I'm sorry what are you asking me
Caller: how big is your butt, your ass is fine how big is your ass
Me: its about to get much bigger i just ordered a pizza

then i hung up.

Its possible that this was a legitimate caller, (doubtful but possible) But really I'm not about to discuss the lovely dimensions of my juicy, round, spank-able ass on the phone out of the blue like that with someone who wont even tell me their name. Id like to think that i am just that exciting that you cant help but get right into the "ass" before you tell me who you are... but really i think it was just some dude jerking off on the phone.

If i wanted to get guys off on the phone, id open a phone sex service, i prefer to get them off in person!

Enough about me, what do you think about me?

Mini reviews being hijacked i see it more and more...

A mini review is a short blurb a "hobbyist" ie client writes about a "providers" ie escort. It's usually because a formal review takes a while and the dude wants to get the word out. She was great or she sucked. Almost all mini reviews are positive in nature.

What I've been observing lately is escorts who are not the escort being reviewed jumping on the mini review thread in a very thinly veiled attempt to steal the girls who are being written about thunder. To bring all the attention to herself. In many cases they don't even give the subject of the mini review time to thank her client for the acknowledgment. I find this kind of behavior classless and opportunistic. Are times that tough that you have to try to step on someone elses praise in hopes that you can get everyone to "look at me, look at me, look at me"? or is it a narcissistic need to always be the center of attention and not letting another girl have her moment and shine.... On her own goddamed mini review.

It reeks of desperation to me, peppered with little nuggets of a personality disorder to act in such a way over and over. Sure we all want attention, and in this biz attention can often equal money. However there is enough room for all of us to eat. Let someone else have their moment in the sun, especially on their own review. They were the one in the room making the client feel special not some opportunistic, insecure escort who must have all eyes on her no matter the situation.

Some girls just don't get it and will never be comfortable letting another female bask in the glow of her own accomplishments and sadly they just never will.