So you wanna be a hooker?

Every time there's a big mainstream media article about Hookers i get contacted by young hopefuls asking for advice on how to get into the game of pay for play companionship. With Radars recent debacle (hipster hookers my ass) the amount of mail I'm getting asking for advice is off the hook. So to save myself from having to repeat myself over and over to inquiring minds i thought id share some of my words of wisdom, advice, warnings, ramblings or what ever you wanna call it.

My first bit of advice is: DON'T DO IT.
There are girls who have stellar reviews and long standing reputations who are not making ends meat right now. Wanting to get into the escort business at this time is like wanting to get into the employment game after 911, there is little work. The economy is bad and its an election year which always causes work to cease.

If you still want to brave the bad economy and heavy competition here are some things to think about.

Get a professional website: Make sure you have a stats package so you can see where your referring hits are coming from. This will be really helpful, you can see where you advertising efforts ie dollars are paying off and converting to clicks to your site. You want to work smarter not harder.

Get professional pictures: Makes all the difference in the world. Classy pictures attract, classy clients. Skanky pictures ... well you get the picture.

What will you do for money: Don't let anyone talk you out of your comfort zone ... ever.

Screen Clients: You need a way to be sure someone is who he says he is so you don't get into trouble and you need to make sure someone isn't scary to see. This is VERY important, always screen potentials. You need to become a JR private eye. You must be 100% sure of who you are seeing, if they don't screen, then don't see them. Never drop your guard no matter how broke you are. Don't get greedy.

Watch the competition: http://www.eros-guide.com look at the ads for the girls in your area, see what they charge how they present themselves. Who do you want to be?

Treat it like a business: Be professional in your dealings with others. Investments of time and money are necessary to be successful, as with any business.

Keep your personal information PERSONAL: Be careful who you trust, its an isolating business, it can get tough, you often feel like you live in a bubble and will want to reach out to others in the subculture. Chose your friends wisely. This is a cut throat business and there are lots of people who are nuts attracted to it. You are who your friends are to some degree, someone else's rep can spill over to you. Someone with your personal information can really hurt you. I was outed, its not fun, it can be devastating.

Don't quit your day job: Living off the grid is difficult, you want to appear as normal as possible. Its tiring to be an escort and have a day job but in the long run you will have more to show for it.

Besides all that, i go back to my first bit of advice... I don't recommend ANYONE do this.

It's not easy money, you work HARD for it and it takes a toll on you physically and emotionally. It makes real interpersonal relationships hard... for most, impossible. You have to lie to the people you love and care about on a daily basis and that is a very hard thing to do, it gets much harder over time, living a double life is not easy. Its a risky business (emotionally, physically) if you insist on being an escort you need to work smart and minimize your risk. Not everyone is cut out to do this, you have to be able to compartmentalize your emotions, you have to be able to reject societies stigma, its not glamour and glitz, it has its moments but this is job and a job with real risks.

Escorts are risk managers, we have to be its how we survive.

Radar Blows It Again

I was gonna leave this one alone on my blog since I've been commenting on it all over the innerweb on other blogs and on the article itself but I've been getting a lot of email so i thought i would pony on up with some thoughts on radars latest look into the sex for cash biz.

As some of you know i enjoy Radar Magazine, I've been Quoted in it, I've worked with a writer there on another possible upcoming story but the last couple of "hooker" oriented stories makes me wonder... what the hell happened to Radar? First they publish a mean spirited bunch of drivel making up a premises for Ashley Dupree's new reality series, written by top misogynist Alex Balk. He writes of the "whores" with such spittle vigor you'd think he had a personal stake in it, or maybe just not enough Mommy love as a child.

Then Radar publishes the latest bit of wonderment about the sex for money biz titled "Secrets of a Hipster Hooker" it supposedly a first person look at the high end hooker game in NYC, where the author crosses the line and attempts to turn a trick but runs out on the client in the end (yeah i know spoiler) I swear you have a more honest look at the sex for money biz watching Harold Robbins' mini series 79 Park Avenue. I've been all over the web commenting how this fluff and turn piece is just a bunch of made up BULLSHIT.

Other blogs of note are also commenting on Radars latest guffaw and have some interesting takes on the piece, making great observations. Susannah Breslin of The Frisky says "the realities of sex work are far too hardcore for most aspiring “hipster hookers” to handle" and she couldn't be more right.

Monica of the Spread Blog goes into depth and just tears it up, in the process makes a keen observation I think the idea of putting yourself out there as a (possible) consumable piece of merchandise is gratifying, and talking about in an article is in many ways an attempt to publicly confirm your fuckability

Even the Valley Wag gets into the mix, Melissa Gira Grant reports on it by saying "She went it at like a novelist-wannabe temp showing up for a stint as a file clerk".

Most of these tend to give the writer the benefit of the doubt and play along with her story as if its real. I still think its total and complete bullshit. Salon talks about how she wrote this piece and then shopped it around. I think they mean watched a lot of Showtime and did a little innerweb blog search, read a romance novel or two then wrote it and shopped it but hey thats just my take on it.

You think that any media outlet buying it would either...
a) Label it the fiction it is
b)FACT CHECK IT

But nooooo then how would they get their made up view of hookers. All of us making 300,00 bucks per year and keeping our money in gold bars (doesn't everyone have a stash of gold bullion?) carrying 1,000 handbags and having great high powered day jobs. All our clients are the wealthy, young, rich, banker types who lavish us with tips in original art work by recognized artists. Then once again they force feed us the same old tired bullshit to justify and explain why young ladies get into sex work.... its empowering. ahhhhhh BULLSHIT.

Peridotash ex-escort and current Domme has a recent blog entry where she asks sex workers the Three top reasons they do what they do.. No surprise the number one answer... MONEY. Empowerment is the fantasy justification as to why some women choose to fuck for money. Its the same old line of bullshit, "its not the money, its the sex", "I'm not money motivated...I'm just horny" :::giggle:: :::hair flip::: Anyone who has honestly talked to a hooker when shes getting off her 4th trick for the day and he was a smelly, small dicked, pushy, weasel of a man who kept tuning her nipples in like they were radio dials until they were sore, will tell you... that the empowerment angle, is utter and complete bullshit.

I have to hand it to Radar they really out did themselves on this one.. F minus!